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First steps if you're thinking about divorce
Summary
Start with safety and privacy. Then gather your papers, list what you own and owe, and talk to a family lawyer before big moves like moving out, moving the children, or taking money from joint accounts.
In Georgia, one spouse usually must have lived here for 6 months to file, and on the usual no-fault ground, a divorce can't be granted sooner than 30 days after the other spouse is served.
Make sure you and your children are safe
If you don't feel safe at home, put safety first. A domestic violence advocate can help you plan, find shelter and ask the court for a protective order.
Georgia: Georgia's 24-hour statewide hotline is 1-800-334-2836 (1-800-33-HAVEN), with help in Spanish and other languages.
Why it matters: Everything else, including the legal steps, goes better once you're safe.
Protect your privacy
Use a phone and email only you can get into. Change passwords, turn off shared locations, and avoid looking things up on a shared computer. Use private browsing if you need to.
Why it matters: Messages and searches on a shared phone or computer can be seen by others, and can come up later in a case.
Don't make big moves yet
Before you move out, move the children, close joint accounts or take money out, talk to a lawyer. Keep paying the bills you normally pay.
Why it matters: Sudden moves can affect custody and how property is divided. A lawyer can tell you what's safe to do now.
Gather your papers
Collect copies of tax returns, pay stubs, bank and retirement statements, the mortgage or lease, loans and credit cards. Keep them somewhere private.
Why it matters: Your lawyer will need them early, and it's much easier to make copies now than later.
List what you own and what you owe
Write down the house, cars, bank accounts, retirement accounts, a business if there is one, and every debt, with rough values.
Why it matters: Dividing property and debts is a big part of most divorces. A clear list saves time and legal fees.
Work out a monthly budget
Note what it costs to run your home each month: housing, utilities, food, childcare, insurance, car and school costs.
Why it matters: Support and temporary arrangements are based partly on real monthly costs.
Keep the children out of the middle
Keep their routines steady. Don't ask them to choose sides or carry messages, and don't talk about the case in front of them.
Georgia: A child 14 or older can choose which parent to live with. The judge follows that choice unless living with that parent isn't in the child's best interest.[1] For children 11 to 13, the judge must consider their wishes, but the wishes don't decide it.
Why it matters: Judges decide custody based on what's best for the child, and how each parent handles this period matters.
Keep it calm, and keep it in writing
Be polite and brief with your spouse. Where you can, communicate by text or email and keep it to practical things. Stay off social media about your marriage.
Why it matters: Written messages are clearer, and anything you post or send may be read in court.
Learn the basics for Georgia
A divorce can be uncontested, when you agree on everything, or contested, when a judge decides what you can't agree on. Many contested cases go to mediation first.
Georgia: To file here, one spouse usually must have lived in Georgia for at least 6 months,[2] and on the usual no-fault ground, a divorce can't be granted sooner than 30 days after the other spouse is served.[3]
Why it matters: Knowing the basic path makes your first conversation with a lawyer faster and cheaper.
Talk to a family lawyer before you sign anything
If your spouse or their lawyer gives you papers to sign, don't sign until you understand them. If you've been served, note the date.
Georgia: You usually have 30 days after service to file an answer.[4]
Why it matters: An agreement you sign can be hard to undo later, and missing a deadline can mean decisions are made without you.
Questions you might ask a lawyer
- Is it safe for me to move out, or to stay?
- What should I do about our joint accounts right now?
- What papers do you need from me first?
- How do your fees work, and what will the first steps cost?
Common questions
What should I do first if I'm thinking about divorce?
Make sure you and your children are safe, protect your privacy, and gather copies of your financial papers. Talk to a family lawyer before moving out, moving the children or moving money.
Should I move out before the divorce?
Talk to a lawyer first if you can. Moving out can affect custody and how property is divided. If you don't feel safe, your safety comes first.
How long do I have to live in Georgia to file for divorce?
One spouse usually must have lived in Georgia for at least 6 months before filing.[2]
Sources
- ^ O.C.G.A. § 19-9-3, a child's choice of parent (WomensLaw)
- ^ O.C.G.A. § 19-5-2, residence requirements (Justia)
- ^ O.C.G.A. § 19-5-3, grounds for divorce (FindLaw)
- ^ O.C.G.A. § 9-11-12, time to answer (Justia)
Laws and court rules change. If something here looks out of date, email help@divorce.city.